i was going 2 write a book a few years ago when i was climbing out of the tomb i had created 4 myself. it never came 2 light because i never felt it was good enough 4 anyone 2 read. over the years....a few people have actually read what i had completed. here was the outcome.
1. they all said they liked it (i love them all 2 death...but its hard 2 get people that care about u 2 give u a constructive opinion!).
2. it got people 2 think and form opinions which; in return, started very deep conversations.
3. even though i am far from a literature major, an author, or even a conventional poet....i thought i had some pretty good points.
i seperated the chapters into emotions (ex. Chapter 1 : the love, Chapter 2 : the hate, ect.). i came across a notebook i use 2 write my theories in so when i came 2 that portion of my book....i would have a loose outline. here are a few of my notes that stuck out on the page. i thought some people that only know one side of me could see another part of my thinking. a childhood friend of mine once told me "i like your writing....but u only show one side of yourself. why is everything u write so dark and painful? ure funny as hell and u make everyone laugh when they should b crying.". i replied, "the painful times are burned into our memories as we forget about a happy time because if we delete the pain....we are sure 2 repeat it again.".
i took note of what he was saying because in all reality....he was right. i am more than death walking.
with that said....here are a few of my life experiences that have changed my way of thinking over the years. i hope if nothing else....it gets your gears turning. everyone that reads this is special 2 me. feel free 2 ask me any questions about my thoughts after u finish this.
Theories of ceL<~The hunger 4 technology and money has replaced the hunger 4 the knowlege of why this life actually exists. We give up so much of our thought process away to this ignorant cause that our people have become violence hungry slaves to our luxuries and "new and improved" way of thinking.
<~In order to be at peace with yourself mentally, you must take complete responsibility for your shortcomings as well as all of your success. You also must accept the truth, even if it causes you pain or loss. This is what makes you a strong person. Other peoples perception of your way of thinking should never change what you know to be true. Conversations should only add to what you know as the truth. This is essential to positive mental growth. Every conversation has something you can gain knowlege from in order to strengthen you as a person.
<~Evey form of entertainment is a direct product of someone elses pain or torment in their life. Their art form is therapy so the suffering they feel is not in vain. For example, the comedian uses comedy to express his/her sorrow to uplift others in a positive fashion. The musician uses his/her lyrics to relay the knowlege he/her possess' in order to reach out to people that use music as their release. Pain has such a mass appeal to people. People thrive of of this pain. Pain is embraced as art, where as; in its natural form, it is shunned. Pain is love, and love is pain.
<~This world is so distracted by racial differences when they are on the lower to middle class bracket. The only two groups that actually exists is the rich and the poor. If the poor people would care about this fact, they would have major social, political, and physical power over their oppressors. The rich people do what they want to. The poor people do what they have to. My theory is that the poor people far outweigh the rich so if westop bickering with each other and care, we would have a much louder voice in our society.
<~"The mind is like a book. it is useless unless it is open".When you have an open mind, you have no limits to what you can personally acheive. I belive strongly in metaphysical activities. This is designed for self-preservation and being prepared for what lies ahead. The reason people chose to deny this fact is because of religious and scientifical roadblocks that are placed in our lives. there is as much proof to this as it is in God and the proof of distant galaxies.
<~The things you cherish today with all of your energy will be a thorn in your side tomorrow. Humans are never content because the things we want to obtain change as you grow older. Having perky silicone breasts when you become 60 years old. Having beautiful tattoes covering your wrinkled body. Having to pay the property taxes on your multi-million dollar home when your income stops flowing. Knowlege is the only asset that you obtain that never loses value. Best of all, knowlege is free and if it is used right; it can be passed down to the next generation.
<~The only thing on this earth that i fear is myself. No one can phase me mentally or spiritually. That is something I will always possess. I also can be very self-destructive which is a double-edged sword. The negative aspect of this is that outside of what I write, no one will ever see my true feelings. I live by the saying, "expect nothing from others and you will never be disappointed". I might die alone, but in reality, don't we all??
<~You should never write for someone else because your thoughts are your property void of negative critisism. Not everyone is going to like what you have to say. The same goes with conversation. If you do not represent your truest emotions, you will gain nothing plus you sacrifice yourself for the sake of "talking".
<~The only time a true friend shows his/her true colors are when they are outside of your presence. Anyone can smile in your face, but a real person will never allow someone else to speak negatively on you when you are gone without stating your strong points. Someone that is true to you is defined when you are not around.
<~The only reason you can hate another is extreme admiration. Your worst "enemy" gained your attention for this reason. Within your enemy is a quality in which you personally cannot obtain.Therefore, love and hate are almost exactly the same emotion. You restlessly seek the attention of your enemy just as you would if you loved them.
<~Happy people do not do drugs. If you use drugs, there is a deep emotional reason. You will never quit until u resolve that problem. The addiction is mental. Everyone on this planet has some sort of addiction. I beleive without a vice, your existence would be incomplete. the human mind must have some type of stimulation weither mental, physical, or chemical in order to dull the pain of living. The mental vices some people experience is the need to be surrounded by people all of the time or an addiction to food. Others experience physical addictions such as alcohol, drugs, or pain. Some people have chemical addictions like niccotine and caffiene. No one should judge other peoples addictions without taking a long look in the mirror. Weither you are "on the paper chase" or "chasing the dragon", you are an addict.
